Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Party to Damascus

i think i cant draw anymore. well that just stinks.

my thoughts are scarce today. random nothingness.

im rooting for taufik. isnt he just darn adorable?

i still like jacques brautbar. this fascination with scrawny boys never cease to end.

a huge spoonful of hiphop is always good to perk things up.

school is starting. sometimes i wish it will just burn down with that girl from friendster that i extremely hate in it. teehehe. so i kid, i kid.

it dont get more ghetto than this

teehehe.

end.

ladollyvita at 2:44 PM

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

this is on impulse

i now realize that this layout is rather disturbing. it shows obsession. tee hee hee. sorry boy but i think i should do a new one. you know i adore you, you whore (=

when i was a stupid kid, i used to cancel words that i thought was repetition like the sentence above..."...i adore you, ~~you~~ whore." i said to myself how stupid the authors are, to have grammatical errors in childrens' books.

have you been on friendster lately? of cos you have! i know i have! everybody do daily checks on friendster. now you should know that almost everybody who is anybody dresses the same as the next person crossing the road and almost everybody listens to bands that are considered cool and almost everybody loves the art of photography!

now heres a big fuck you to almost everybody (=

fashion konon...po da! almost everybody on the darn streets of orchard road dresses like you and listen to the same darn music. you're not cool beb. you are just like everyone else, scraping bits and pieces from the media, magazines and internet. we are all alike, you should know that by now.

maybe now its time for everyone to dress alike, ~~like~~ mork.

we are all the same.

(and do you even know who is mork? bahh.)

ladollyvita at 9:44 PM

Sunday, November 21, 2004

the girl with the rose is so darn annoying. get out of the picture foo.

ladollyvita at 6:31 PM

i am not a groupie.i just so happen to pass by with the camera.tee hee hee.

ladollyvita at 6:28 PM

Saturday, November 20, 2004

have you ever felt fastforward?

there are times when the voice in my head spins with blurred pictures. it makes me twitch when this happens. i feel like my head is shaking vigorously in pain and my eyes wondering around crazy eyed.yet it is strange how nobody will notice. for a minute or so everything is fastforward >> its a strange feeling that i cant put in words. it used to happen during childhood days. but it happened that day. oh how rare.

im just a happy kid.

ladollyvita at 4:15 PM

Thursday, November 18, 2004

i hate people. i want to eat them.

today is not a good day.

send me your flowers in december.

ladollyvita at 2:34 PM

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Hair Revolution

at its peak

i am greatly disturbed with my new hair. honestly, i dont like it. but i do not want to treat it unfairly like my previous haircuts so i am giving it the same treatment, i am trying quite hard to love it. i have come to conclusion that kenny is not my fav and i will call for another person to do my hair next time. but he does give me a gd price on this hair.

laugh as you may. i know i did. i feel funny. i look like the ten yr old kid i teach every week. eww.

the fringe should be longer. damn you kenny. what is done, is done. get over it elly. the boy did try to cheer me up saying i look like go-go from kill bill vol. 1. hah! i wish!

i shall make do with this for now. thank god for hairclips and what not.

bahh.

ladollyvita at 2:05 PM

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Selamat Hari Raya

maaf zahir dan batin

ladollyvita at 1:15 PM

Sunday, November 07, 2004

"There is so much hurt in this game of searching for a mate, of testing, trying. And you realize suddenly that you forgot it was a game, and turn away in tears."

the past few days has been rather dramatic to the point that i simply cant take it anymore. i need to go to the beach and sleep on the dirty, rocky sands of pasir ris park. but alas, i am too weak to crawl out of bed or even bother about new pimples emerging. the simplicity of life that i once embraced with my little hands has now turned complex and dull at the same time. this is yet another phase.

i find myself scrutinizing everything to its very core and then get frustrated with the outcome of truth in it. the truth does hurt in so many ways only the stabbing of a butcher's knife into one's chest can potray. past memories should be locked up in a vault and never be opened up unless you are taking in your last breath. but that is obviously impossible because you will somehow stop and think. everytime you start to think of your life, the past haunts you down like a dog. usually you will remember more vividly the rotten memories. oh how you despise them.

noticed how i suddenly went into denial and stopped using 'I' and used 'you' instead? i am forever in denial. sometimes my ego is bigger than a hundred fat cows put together. arent we all the same.

i do not blame anybody for this slight nauseating stench of a pinch of life.

the only path back to my sanity is the one with the boy. he is the greatest gift from above and i am forever grateful. no matter how lost and in distress i feel, in the end i will fall back onto the one person that will comfort me with the whole of his heart, and that is his love.

"Not to be sentimental as i sound, but why the hell are we conditioned into the smooth strawberry-and-cream Mother Goose world, Alice in Wonderland fable, only to be broken on the wheel as we grow older and become aware of ourselves as individuals with a dull responsibility in life?" - Sylvia Plath (The Journals of Sylvia Plath)

ladollyvita at 1:54 PM