Friday, May 28, 2004
i wont be updating this for awhile.i am now busy with life.haha.so dont bother to come in here again.theres nothing for you to read.ok end.see you when i see you.
ladollyvita at 2:11 PM
Tuesday, May 25, 2004
im done lynox. if you hate it. darn you i say. darn you. hurhurhur.
ladollyvita at 7:48 PM
Monday, May 24, 2004
enough of the short hiatuses elly.sheesh.
but i had a reason.i was doing this new stripy layout.i like stripes.stripes are in.they are -so- in.i thought i will take forever cos you know...i dont know shit about computers and what have you.but looky here, i took less than a week.zippydydoodah.
went out with my dear tuition kid that night.i had fun.yelah~ orang takde adek kan.heh.met kenny and javana again.kenny so cute and handsome.javana so pretty.played shopping,dinosaurs,hamster playhouse and monopoly with them and their american slang.darn cute.i love kids.
cabron, cabron, cabron, cabron...lets do the electric bagaloo.
ladollyvita at
10:26 PM
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
On Hiatus
yet again. oh shush.
ladollyvita at
6:46 PM
you know sometimes im afraid i express too much that it will just turn out scary in the end. pls eh pls. im not scary. well maybe i am. but not to the extend that you will kill yourself just to get away from me. maybe only to the extend that you will chase me with a racket and a bat just to shut me up. hurhurhur. i should have a personal journal. sometimes things get too deep you know. yeah. you know what. i think i'll go make one later.
to that person over there i just think that you rock like a herd of seamonkeys carrying malaysian flags. yeah. wait let me rephrase that. i dont just think that. but i know that.
ladollyvita at 4:18 PM
Monday, May 17, 2004
twist me around, all i need is someone whos willing to stroke through my hair like a soft blowing breeze. my poor sentimental side. twist me around.
you knocked on my door when i can't stop crying and you stayed here with me as time healed. you ease my thoughts everytime my mind starts to fool me. i am sorry if i am holding you back. i am not playing with your feelings. i meant every word i said. i am just a little afraid. maybe, just a little bit. but i assure you it will go away soon. pretty soon. please wait a little while. im not pushing you away for taking too long, am i? i promise you that we will go to the zoo, take pictures with snakes and pretend we are top models. haha. i have no idea how to describe you. you make me feel different. so brand new. maybe im afraid because it has been long since actually being in-like with anyone. no, rafiqin doesnt count bcos he is like a girl. you are my superbhero. i like you.
honestly.
ladollyvita at 11:44 AM
Sunday, May 16, 2004
i am having fun surfing around the bloggers profiles. very, very interesting. but i didnt find any singaporeans yet. thats rather surprising.
my mom peeled the whole bunch of rambutans already. woowee. she made my life extra easier.
oh yah...
Anyone of you eat cornflakes or honeystars with milo instead of milk?
i would really like to know.
and mozafar is odd.
ladollyvita at 5:21 PM
Saturday, May 15, 2004
just give me a bloody hug you stupid monkey.
ladollyvita at
10:26 PM
hmm...boys in ringers...hmm...*slurp*
late night conversations drown me into a peaceful deep slumber.
serenity. do you feel it too?
you know what...
if you stare at your fingers for a long time, you'll start to think it looks kind of funny. those detailed lines starts to irritate you. those almost invisible hair suddenly becomes magnified times hundred in your eyes. then you will in the end conclude that you have funny fingers.
*tada*
i think i have funny fingers.
ladollyvita at 6:27 PM
Friday, May 14, 2004
get the vines - winning days album. its good.
since im broke, i just got to burn it all.
Come.
Sit with me on the edge and play your guitar.
We'll sing together till the stars fade out.
Promise me you won't stop
even when the sky starts to fall
and my eyes start to tear.
We shall watch the whole world pass us by
like shadows on purple walls.
Come on here.
We got nothing else to lose.
burn, baby, burn.
ladollyvita at 2:20 PM
Thursday, May 13, 2004
The Multiphasic Personality Test
elly, your score is 3% consistent with a normal personality profile. You're least like others in the area of attention seeking.
and unusually altruistic too.
ladollyvita at 8:35 PM
today is not good.
strumming to extreme's more than words. bahh.
slow slow slow day passing by.
acoustic versions on playlist.
im fantasizing. big time.
ladollyvita at 2:59 PM
yesterday was a kick arse day.went shopping with lynox and laughed like hyenas throughout the whole day and night.haha.
i bought my stuff already!!!
now i heart my new ringer shirt and my new shoes and my new jeans.
oh its de-lovely~!
but at the end of the day...
i got to know a really, really bad news. and for that i shall sigh. haiz...
i feel like my heart was broken again yesterday.
no, this has got nothing to do with fagwhores.
as quoted by pai..."faggotten"
yes. forgotten.
ouh god the heartache. this is worse than what those fagwhores did. goddamnit.
sigh.
ladollyvita at 1:07 PM
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
pops: Elly, bangun
me: huh..seterika tu kan ader!
pops: huh? bangun lah
me: tu seterika buat aper!
pops: tgh ngigau eh
ngigau-ing is weird. i realized i was apparently ngigau-ing right after my father said "tgh ngigau eh"
anyway,
im hoping you won't end up like imran.
please don't. stay longer, ok?
ladollyvita at 10:37 AM
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
okay so isnt it stoopid?
that im putting this 'comment' thing when there is a shoutbox?
yeap yeap.
one of it got to go.
comments?box?comments?box?comments?box?comments?box?
going shopping with my ggggrrrrfriends yet again tomorrow and maybe on thursday too.
most important: faded blue jeans, mary janes and ringers.
its hard to find a nice straight-cut used-looking faded blue jeans.yes, i am a difficult customer and a budget one too. hurhurhur.
ladollyvita at 11:34 PM
It is strangely exciting when a total stranger types your name in his entry. that made my day for today.
zippidydoodah
ladollyvita at
8:24 PM
Monday, May 10, 2004
Battling Cyborgs and One-legged pirates beyond imagination.
The result of my fear derives from an invisible force which had managed to find its way through the crux of my soul and cracked opened, my weakness. Curse that Johnny. Curse that Johnny!
My weakness. Although not yet visible to the public eye. I can feel the raging outburst of it's freedom inside me. Parading itself throughout my mind, like an army of ants celebrating victory of owning my mug of pepsi. How am i suppose to function sanely now that you are no longer buried six feet under. Where are my ninja warriors in sexy latex suits? I command you to destroy The Enemy! Even they, are long gone. Now it's up to me and me alone. Should i embrace your rebirth and try to get use to your presence? Or should i just capture you again for the second time and shove you back to where you came from? You shall not fool me again, oh evil one. For i have learned to one-handedly battle with wooden chopsticks which has stains of last week's kway teow. It was unfair how you, inhumanly invaded my dreams and turned it into unforgettable nightmares. Aren't you just a cunning little thing. My weakness, is a silly monk on crack. This is madness. I am wasting my time contemplating your existence in me. I should just shoot you now with a Remington 700P and then have a houseparty like The Sims. My weakness, is growing. My god, it is growing! You will never take over me you, demon, you!
When i speak of my weakness, please do not get confused, i am not talking about any particular person i know. My weakness is my fear, is my enemy, is my unellyness, and his name is
Johnny.
ladollyvita at
6:24 PM
ooOOoOooOoOOoOooo...new look. i like new things.
they smell funny.
mundane monday.
i wish today is thursday and tomorrow is my birthday.
ladollyvita at 4:07 PM
Sunday, May 09, 2004
I am delirious.
"Are you real?"
she asked.
I enjoy talking in a third person. Maybe if i do it often enough, i will end up being a schizo. That question, was never answered. Just like my question about the moon and plus a million others, left unanswered. I have said goodbye a gazillion, jazillion times (I know jazillion is not a word...or is it? surprise me). Why am i still here? In this little girl's plastic human suit. It is all wrong. I am still not close enough to where i am suppose to be. I think i fractured this girl's finger. It feels weird when i move it. Can you drive me to that place? I promise to give you money. Money makes the world go round. Love makes the world go fucking. No wait...love and money makes the whole world go around fucking. I wonder who first claimed that fuck is a bad word. I am officially a homophobic. Let's celebrate. I'm normal. I killed alot of ants lately. Will they in turn kill me in my life after death? retribution. When will you get it? Why do i always suffer from it. A new mole just appeared on my face. I thought it was dirt. How does a mole grows? Do you constantly feel the urge to fall off a cliff? I do. I do wish to see a shooting star. Guns are sexy. You are not goth, so stop trying. It is rather annoying. She has ulcers. I just popped one of them. Oh you're not a sadist either. Stop trying that too. Uma Thurman has ugly feet and a huge toe. I want to master the art of kungfoo fighting. I want to be Beckham's mistress too. Let's stop this shenanigan. Just hold my hand and promise me no tears.
ladollyvita at 7:27 PM
i am feeling very, very threatened right now. i just realized i have a weakness. no i will not give you further inner detail about it because then you and you and you would use it against me.
stop threatening me, boy.
just in case: erm nur, if i do type the word 'no' in my entry...im not referring it to you. if i do want to type your name, i will type 'nur' or maybe, sometimes, 'faggotwhore'. seriously.)
ladollyvita at 3:45 PM
Saturday, May 08, 2004
i dreamt i was pregnant
o.O
Today is a Saturday.
Today we're going shopping with Elly.
Today is Purrrfectomando.
cheerios and have a kickarse day~!
ladollyvita at 2:15 PM
i was searching for unused drawing blocks under my bed.
found it. it was under there for a long, long time.
i started to draw. draw. draw.
then i flipped the pages and found a letter.
it was one of the unsent letters i write to people.
i will write, place it somewhere and forget abt it.
and there it was. a letter i wrote for him.
just one of those letters i write to tell him (telephatically/pathetically) how i was so happy and content with the thought of us. yadda yadda yadda.
reading it again, pulled me back to the spot i was in while writing it.
to that spot where i was actually telling the whole world i love him.
and then i look at where i am now,
oh how everything changed so fast.
and where im getting at is...
everything happens for a reason. cliche` but true.
a part of me is glad it ended the way it did.
and im holding on to that part.
"elly might still be smiling"
forget abt the what ifs, nur.
if things didnt end up the way it did...i wouldnt have met that other person.(hah!)
i am still smiling, nur.
only now, its not for him.
ladollyvita at 1:19 AM
Friday, May 07, 2004
i managed to dload Kill Bill Vol. 2
BUT...
the freakin subtitle is in freakin french so how the hell should i understand what the freakin Pai Mei is saying. grr. damn you kazaa. damn you i say. damn, damn you.
ladollyvita at 9:11 PM
im waiting patiently for Kill Bill Vol. 2 to load. come on come on come on come on!
we're going shopping this saturday girls.
shirts.
shoes.
contacts.
jeans.
bags.
oh yeah, girlfriend.snap, snap, snap.
t.g.i.f?
nah...i prefer wednesdays and thursdays now.
let's do it.
ladollyvita at 12:47 PM
Thursday, May 06, 2004
guess who called? Ah Chua!
miss you beb. make sure ko turun spore even if its going to be a few years later okay? we all miss you loads. and takmo buat kerjer kerjer mepek kat sana.
WE MISS YOU RAFIE!
alot alot alot alot alot alot
ladollyvita at 6:05 PM
woke up at 10am.
watched Kill Bill 1. FINALLY.
it is buttmunchingly great. such a kickarse movie.
makes me want to kill those fagwhores in such an honourable way.
*hyak-dush*
take that! and this! and that!
*kungfu-style-bitch-slap*
and that! and this! and this!
*hoi-piak*
and again! and that! and then this!
*chops-off-testicals-and-replace-them-with-eyeballs*
end.
im downloading Kill Bill Vol. 2 now. hurhur.
ladollyvita at 1:23 PM
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
to all my darlings, i just heard mega superb news...
Reggae Fest In July
im so going. gerhana skacinta ader beb! woooooweeeee~!
ladollyvita at
9:33 PM
honestly
a month had passed ever since the all-fags-unite-and-eat-elly's-heart-out-with-chopsticks incident. i am still badly traumatised. but dealing with it.
im not sure if i should regret what we had before. in the first place did we even have anything? maybe it was just merely an illusion. maybe when i spoke of love to you. it was not really love. what the heck is love. stoopid thing.
when we were together, i wasn't really happy. i had severe paranoia and insecurities which i shouldn't have had. but i did care for you. always wanting to please you. always wanting to be there with/for you. bahh.
but alas,
your heart goes to him. and then i let go. willingly, voluntarily, sacrificingly.
and thats what i should have done a long time ago.
only the side effects were hard to bear.
i just feel sappy at this very moment. hence, a sappy entry.
im sorry to that person over there for sometimes mentioning that faggotwhore's name in our late night conversations. i know that its not polite to talk about the ex-bf. you are a good listener. i don't know how you can endure my neverending mumblings of unnecessary things. but you truly rock. and you deserve a herd of seamonkeys and a malaysian flag (=
ladollyvita at 8:31 PM
the dutch in old Amsterdam do it
folks in Siam do it
think of siamese twins
some argentines without means do it
lets do it
lets fall in love
i woke up really late today.
bcos it is raining. aww...ultra lovely~
its delightful
its delicious
its delovely
i feel dandy today.
come on and chase after my positivity.
ladollyvita at 4:04 PM
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
its not easy nur.
not easy at all to wake up every morning knowing i was used.
i am trying every day to pass my time without having his pathetic image in my head.
dont you ever say that again "still not over it"
cos that would just provoke me to kick the living crap of your little faggoty arse.
i am trying, you little fuck. TRYING to fucking get over it.
you know, i am a girl afterall.
you have no idea.
how dismantled i am ever since.
ladollyvita at 3:00 PM
Monday, May 03, 2004
monday morning.
silence.
therefore i woke up.
suddenly doorbell rang.
hoping its just some salesmen.
oh crap.
mom is home.
ladollyvita at 10:56 AM
Sunday, May 02, 2004
so what do you do...
when you are in the bathroom and suddenly a large moth appeared out of nowhere and flew around your face?
yes.
you shout like a ten year old girl and bust out of the bathroom as if it was on fire.
stop, drop and roll.
ladollyvita at 3:13 PM
sunday makes me do strange things.
sunday makes me angry.
bad emotions lead to bad dreams. bad, bad, very, very, bad dreams.
ladollyvita at 3:05 PM
hello, good morning. how have you been?
i suddenly feel like i want to grab hold of rafiqin and nur and smash their heads onto a brick wall and put their cocks up their own arseholes and tie a bra over their heads and carve my name onto their plastic hearts and make them watch reruns of days of our lives for ten hours.
erm.
that was one of those 30seconds-of-anger-moment.
i guess the feeling comes and goes.
im sorry.
ladollyvita at 3:33 AM
its around 3am.
i just got back from my grandmama's place.
something is not right.
do you feel it?
cos i do.
and its not good.
ladollyvita at 2:56 AM
Saturday, May 01, 2004
hmm...
the monsters in my tummy are morphing into beautiful butterflies.
hmm...
this is strangely exciting.
last night while i was on the phone in darkness,
something crawled on my feet.
BLOODY FREAKING COCKROACH!
argh.bleargh.yuck.eww.fuck.damnit.
thank god it was dark and i cant see that disgusting tiny hairy legs crawling.
man..fuck.eww.eww.eww.
okay i think i want to puke now.
ladollyvita at 2:12 PM
okay okay...to shazzie wazzie,
you deleted your blog sayang. asal?
and you are from Greenview and is still in greeenview.
which means i know you. i know you. i know you.i know you.
and you better not be that shazana from drama...cos that would be embarassing for you to ever face me again.
seriously, why?
this is honestly amusing.
this is just not cool beb. kau uncool arh.
my picture on the left there, is cooler than you.
im disappointed in you girl.
ladollyvita at 12:52 PM
